What concerns me is that I may have been in this state of mind for 10 or 11 months without even realizing. Time is the most valuable and precious resource and we have to take advantage of it. Once time has passed, it never comes back.
After a lot of time thinking about that period, I came to the conclusion that I was the only one responsible for this situation. Main factors: lack of planning, lack of personal knowledge, fear, laziness, conformism, excessive wishful thinking, living in the past, hoping instead of doing, lack of discipline, lack of goals, and an insane tendency of wishing to change the past.
Four months ago I picked up a book. I think it has slowly changed my life. It was just one of those books that people pick up to improve their habits, ways of thinking, working ethic, etc. I have finished four books ever since and I'm in working in two others. I feel equipped with better mental clarity, better discipline, more control, better prepared for crisis, more willing to take risks, and even happier. But there is still work to do.
Recently I decided to go back to Ecuador to apply the many things I've learned in the USA. I have established specific goals that I need to accomplish within five years. These goals range from professional challenges to family relationships. I hope one day I can look back into the last eight months and think that even though it was a slow lesson, it became the turning point for my life. Life is be a beautiful journey but there will always be difficult times. What matters is not how many times you fall; what matters is how many times you are willing to stand up and keep on moving forward.